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| Journaling through this (N/A) |
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| As the official first poster of this thread/forum I wanted to share with others that I am journaling. My hubby bought me a journal back in 2000 when I graduated with my AA so that I could keep track of my adventures. AND I HAVE! and now I'm up to the night that I left my son with my parents so that I could go to the hospital because things weren't right with my pregnancy with my 2nd son and oh my gosh it's hard to write! never imagined that a little pen and paper would have me so flapped. I put the pen down last Wednesday and I'm REALLY wanting to get through this chapter, (yeah, no pun intended) but jeez! I know I'll be glad once it's all out there and put away safely in my book but WOW this is hard. BUT I also know it is essential to do this so I can move forward. It's been 14 months and 5 days now since Luke was born sleeping. He even sent me his little sister to keep me busy! but that's a whollllllle nother chapter to write about later. Have any of you journaled, scrapbooked, gardened, or done something else to commemorate your baby(ies)? I'd love to hear about it! |
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| Re: Journaling through this (United States) |
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| I did journal for a while. It helped to pour all those feelings out on paper. I would also decorate my son's grave at holidays and visit it when I was feeling especially down. It has been several years now and I no longer journal and no longer live near the grave but those activities were a huge help to me in those first years after my son died. |
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| Re: Journaling through this (N/A) |
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I have often encouraged people in my practice to journal about their feelings of loss. it is especially powerful to speak to the lost loved one in the journal. thanks for the reminder and i'll continue to encourage people in this activity.
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| Re: Journaling through this (United States) |
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| Our only child, a daughter, is now 25 and has a child of her own. My pregnancy losses now seem so long ago, but even though the pain of those losses had eased, there are still times I become lost in thought, wondering about how old they would be, what would they be like, etc. To get back to the beginning; after 5 years of waiting to start our family, my husband and I were very excited to find out we were expecting. It was almost too easy, only a month or two of trying and there we were, planning and dreaming. Well, just before beginning our second trimester, I had a miscarriage. We were devastated. This was indeed a death in our family but what we were shocked to realize was that not only didn't anyone want to hear of our pain, they said things to us that were well meaning but horribly painful. "There must have been something wrong with the baby or that wouldn't have happened." , "Lucky it wasn't really a baby yet", and "At least you hadn't felt movement so you weren't attached" was the most painful of all. We experienced this tragedy 2 more times before our daughter was born, and 2 times after her birth. We tried and tried for several years to find a way to honor our babies in Heaven but never came up with anything that felt right. We felt we might know the sex of each lost child so we named them and that did give significance to them for us. I did journal at times through the years, writing to the babies and trying to work through my feelings of loss. It helped, but recently my husband hit on the perfect tribute. He is a woodworker and creates beautiful pictures out of wood, the technique is called Intarsia. For my birthday just a couple of years ago, he surprised me with a wonderful piece. It was of a young child, playfully splashing in a puddle. You only see this child from the back... For us this figure is "every child" of ours whom we never got to hold. A small brass plate will contain their initials; "PCM, ALM, JPM, JRM, CMM, et al" Once we hit on this tribute we've both felt more comfortable with the past. |
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