Last week I wrote about some of the feelings I was having especially in the area of faith and ask for comments tying to see if what I was feeling was unique to me or if others felt the same way. So far I am still feeling like the odd duck. Some have emailed and I hope a lot more will do so soon. So far no one has taken issue with what I had to say but no one has said they felt the same way.
One person did say that she grew tired of folks saying they were praying for her. She said that did not help, but when folks took her hands and prayed for her it was comforting.
She also told of an experience when she actually felt God hug her. She was driving at the time and felt like God came from her back and put His arms around her. This experience has stayed with her and been a great help in her journey. I have not had such an experience as that which makes me wonder if any other readers have. If so, please write and tell us about it.
Over the years I have had many folks tell me about sensing the presence of God or some have reported sensing the presence of the loved one. I find these reports to be fascinating and want to hear about as many as possible. I have not talked about these openly because I fear others in the audience would be made to wonder why their loved one has not contacted them. It is evident that if these experiences are real, they are rare and I can find no reason why they do not happen to everyone.
There is no way to research these feelings or events. The only way to even study them is by hearing the stories from as many people who have experienced such a thing as possible. Please know that you will not be judged nor thought to be strange. Every experience and every faith is sacred to me. If it works for you, I have no argument to make. I just want to hear the stories.
One reader did offer a very well written list of what she has learned about grief.
Grieving has taught me:
- The loss of a dear love left a hole with in me. The hole doesn’t heal; “life” just grows around it but doesn’t close it off. The hole remains a tender spot that continues to feel loneliness, loss, words, memories….
- Few people know meaningful words of comfort. Many people think they know words of comfort; I had to ignore and forget many of those stupid comments.
- My friends consider me a strong person, and when I reached out to ask for help I didn’t find comfort, understanding or help. Instead, people were uncomfortable, and decided the best way they could help me was to offer their suggestions for my future life. I needed to hear someone acknowledge the pain and loss I was feeling.
- Even after my experiences, I don’t know what to say to someone who has lost a dear love because my grief journey isn’t the same as another’s. To be honest (and this is blunt), I want to say, “I’m sorry the love of your life has died and that has to hurt. I’m even sorrier your future days/weeks/months are really going to suck as you grieve. Be kind to yourself as you find a new normal to your life, even if it means doing things others don’t understand or find normal. And I do pray Jesus will put his arms around you and bring you some comfort.”
Well said, Please send us your story. Doug977@gmail.com
See you next time.
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