I just love this title.  This assumption likely got your attention. The title presumes that doctors are in fact arrogant. I won’t argue or try to convince you one way or another. For one thing, broad generalizations are never a good idea. What is worth our time is to discuss honestly doctor’s behavior which sometimes appears arrogant.

The doctor that delivered me (or should have delivered me if he had made it to the delivery) practiced medicine for over fifty years in a very small town. He was plain spoken, brutally honest, blunt, at times rude, but never accused of being arrogant. This likely stems from the fact that everyone knew and understood him. He was known to tell one patient they are fat because they just eat too damned much. Yet, later in the same day, he might be found comforting a family while sitting at the feet of a cancer patient starting an IV in the foot. When my grandmother was dying, he strolled through the waiting room and announced, “Get everyone together, I am only saying this once.” No one was offended. We knew he loved Grandma. He was understood and loved because he loved and understood his people (his patients).

I think the modern doctor suffers the disadvantage of not being understood and not understanding his people. There are downright arrogant doctors. I have met a few, but very few.  I have met many more tired doctors. Many doctors have gotten cynical from working neck deep in humanity year after year.  They work these hours because it is the culture of medicine. Most doctors are not a part of the community like the old country doctor.

Being a doctor is a hard job. But, what job isn’t hard and stressful. I submit that medicine is unique in terms of the intensity and volume of acute problems we encounter. It is unique in terms of the severity and serious nature of the consequences of our decision making. But, this brings us back to our original presumption—why are some doctors so crabby? I am not making excuses, I am trying to offer insight. Most people can’t really imagine the volume of high impact decisions and problems a doctor is dealing with on any given day. Let’s say you go to the doctor complaining of fatigue late in the day. By the time you see the doctor, fatigue is a minor problem to him. He may have already told a patient they have cancer that morning. He has dealt with a nervous demanding mother over the fever of her young child. He had to tell one patient who was a drug seeker that he will not give any pain medication. He has dealt with an angry son over the care of his mother. The hospital is calling to complete his charts. Just before seeing you, he was working up a patient with chest pain. The doctor is anticipating having to tell that patient he needs to go to the hospital. Just as the doctor is entering your room, the nurse tells him his attorney is on the phone. This reminds him of the lawsuit that is looming over his head.

I will submit that what appears to be arrogance and coldness in some doctor’s behavior is actually fatigue and a reaction to stress. Doctors are well compensated. That compensation really doesn’t negate the stress and frustration that comes with practicing medicine day after day.

If you encounter a grouchy doctor in the future, consider cutting him some slack. Try contemplating what stress this human has experienced that day. You should expect to be treated with dignity and respect, even if the doctor seems distracted, tired, and short at times. Life is hard for us all. Maybe it wouldn’t be so hard if we all understood each other better.